Mickey Hutton's Review

Do you remember, when you were a kid & your sister was always learning to play some dumb instrument? The screechier the better seemed to be the rule of thumb and if she could use it as a weapon that was perfect. Which came in handy for her when you were trying to wrestle it out of her hands so you could watch Blue Peter in peace.

I have, over the years had my nose broken, by a recorder, a violin smashed over my back and on one memorable occasion had a tenor horn thrown at me. Luckily for me it missed. Not so lucky was Gordon our budgie who’s cage the horn hit. That’s a sound I shall remember ‘till I die. And as deaths go that probably wasn’t the way poor Gordon expected to pop his clogs. He’d probably envisaged himself dying peacefully on his perch then spending the rest of eternity sitting on cuttle-fish clouds in budgie heaven. Not, being hit by a brass instrument travelling at thirty miles an hour.

These were all thoughts that sprang to mind when I put on the first track, “Mr Blue,” by Catherine Feeny from the The Lockout Volume 1, the first CD released by Blujay & Jongleurs featuring some of the acts from their very popular Lockout showcase nights at Jongleurs in Camden Town.

Catherine catapulted me back to a time when my sister was learning to play the piano and I was trying to break her fingers. The track begins with simple childish piano and Catherine’s beautiful haunting voice making a perfect counterpoint to the deceptively simple keyboard line.

It appears the band seem to remember one by one that they should be playing on the track and when the haunting trumpet and deliciously sloppy drums kicked in I was playing air mandolin and singing along like a girl at a McFly gig. I love Catherine Feeny me. She’s on my i-pod. For ever.

Anna Kranz certainly doesn’t sound like a kid at all when her track Sweeter Devotion came shimmering out of my speakers like a bad girl in a tight dress from a thirties B movie, all Tamla drumming, hot Hammond organ and cutting slow ska guitar Anna sounds now, how Joss stone would like to sound like when she grows up. This is perfect pop, and the lyric, “When you drown me in your shit and then you hang me out to dry.”, caused me to spit my Baileys….out my nose. Expect Sweeter Devotion to be the theme tune to the next Hugh Grant rom-com.

“Stray Dog” by Passenger made me stare at the speakers wondering what was going on. Heavy backwards echo, a voice that seemed to be whispering in my ear. The slappy drumming and finger picking creep up on you and by the time the strings snake their way in, it sounds like Peter Gabriel has swallowed Damien Rice and they’re giving James Blunt a good kicking for a laugh. The ending is scary, made all the hairs on my body stand up, which is a feat in itself because I’m dead hairy me. If I’d been naked I would’ve looked like Chewbacca touching a Van de Graaf generator. Weird, wonderful and should be number one!

I’ve got a thing about guitars I can’t get enough of them especially when they’re played delicately, the way Karima Francis plays on her track, “The Author.” But don’t think that just because Karima plays as if there’s angels licking the strings, that her singing is going to be all girly wirly. Her voice is bendy, cracked, soulful, and I want to write, FUCKING FANTASTIC! But I probably won’t be allowed. It’ll break your heart. Under no circumstances should you listen to this track if you’ve just been dumped! I of course, have no idea what those last words mean.

Believe it or not there was a time when Elton John was good. I know, I know, you think I’m liar, liar pants on fire, but he used to be fab. He hasn’t always been the big, fat queeny, wiggy bloke. I loved him and he broke my heart when he got crap. But now I’ve got Jon Green. I’m going to send his exquisite track, “Songs In The Key Of You,” to Elton and see if It’ll inspire him to get as good as this again.

Now I’m enjoying listening to this album but I have to say it was all getting a bit minor key, probably D minor the saddest of all keys. When up pops Pam Sheyne with her country tinged song, “Gonna Make You Miss Me.” Co written by my new love Jon Green it made realise that country is cool. My I-pod’s going to be flippin’ full up at this rate.

I’m getting married! And the lucky lady is Mara Carlyle, well she’ll now obviously be called Mara Hutton. Just one listen to her smoky night club voice singing her tune, “I Blame You Not,” sealed the deal. Love you Mara. Now get home and get me tea on.

Homer Simpson and I have a lot in common we’re both been in space, we have both had angry mobs carrying flaming torches in our front gardens and we both worship sweet, sweet beer. So when a track starts with a bottle being opened and drink being poured that’s going to get my attention. What’s even better is Kris Buckle’s, “Taste Like Fruit,” it’s a funky blues number with tricky guitar playing and a harmony heavy chorus, the perfect accompaniment to drinking. As Kris sings, “this life doesn’t get much better,” It doesn’t Kris it doesn’t. You’re my besht mate you are.

There’s a programme on the telly called “Primeval” it’s about monsters from 250 million years ago arriving here through a rip in time! I think Mamas Gun’s Andy Platt is using that rip in time, but he’s only going to the seventies and he’s bringing a monster funk sound back here to 2007. He’s got the seventies feel down perfectly on his track, “Finger On It.” Maaaaaan I feel like Huggy Bear. James Brown ain’t dead he’s Mamas Gun. Believe!

It’s all in the name. Smoke Feathers, great name, track called “Liberation Theology,” can’t go wrong really. And he doen’t put one tootsie out of line. This reggae tinged acoustic groove tune had me dancin’ baby dancin’. I won’t be doing that again. And if I do I’ll certainly be wearing men’s clothes the next time.

If there’s a sexier instrument than the banjo I’ve yet to find it. But couple that up with tinkly piano, big loose strummed guitar and crooned vocals, its pop porn I tells ya, pop porn and I’m lovin’ it! The Goodbye Plot’s tune, “All Kinds of Everything,” puts me in a warm place and I ain’t coming out.

Which is handy because I can listen to the final track on this compilation, “High,” by Tyler and it’s a groover kids. Big fat chorus, jangly guitars and I would like to kiss the drummer on the mouth ‘cos that kid can play.

Twelve top tracks from twelve of the best new acts in Britain. Visit the website www.lockoutmusic.com and have a listen yourself. That would be a lovely thing to do.

Mickey Hutton